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100 Ideas for Your Inevitable Legolas Fanfic

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100 Ideas for Your Inevitable Legolas Fanfic

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The list continues. In this section, a larger variety of genres are covered. It would probably help to read the first installment before this one.

I have put stars next to the ideas I have actually read about in a work of fanfiction.

Enjoy!



100 IDEAS FOR YOUR INEVITABLE LEGOLAS FANFIC (CONT.)

Part Two: 51-100

Disclaimer:
I own nothing pertaining to the Lord of the Rings. I do, however, own this list.

Romance Options

Warning: You have a 99% chance of being flamed if you write a romance. Just to let you know.

Advice: In these stories, always make Legolas fall in love with the female before she has fallen in love with him. We can’t have the heroine seeming too desperate, can we? In the best scenario, they hate each other at first. In the second best scenario, she thinks of him as ‘just a friend’, while he would gladly die for her. It’s so romantic that way.

51. Legolas falls into our world, meets the girl of his dreams and falls in love with her.


This is why (or we’ll pretend this is why) Legolas did not marry in Middle-Earth. The girl of his dreams (GOHD) lives elsewhere! And of course he’ll have to meet her somehow. So, one day, as he’s strolling through Mirkwood, whistling a merry tune, he accidentally tumbles into Idaho or wherever the GOHD lives. And she’s calm in a crisis and he falls in love with her. And eventually she falls in love with him. And he decides to stay in Idaho (or wherever) because Mirkwood was so terrible and his father was so cruel to him. And everyone is happy. Except for Thranduil, who has repented, but too late.

52. Legolas falls in love with a mortal and she is transformed into an Elf.

Legolas does not deserve to be thwarted in love! The girl does not deserve to die! Cleverly remove all obstacles to their marriage by transforming the Sue into an Elf! It’s more convenient for everyone.

Advice: For this sort of story, feel free to include in Middle-Earth unicorns, fairies, and other cute creatures that Tolkien forgot to mention in his writings. Recycle your ‘There Are Vampires in Middle-Earth’ essay by replacing the word ‘vampire’ with ‘unicorn’ every time it appears. Then taunt the purists some more.

Alternate Idea: Legolas falls in love with a mortal and becomes mortal too. (The downside to this story is that Legolas will have to die, poor Elf.)*

Alternate Idea for the Alternate Idea: Legolas falls in love with a mortal, becomes mortal too, and then he and she become Elves when Mandos has pity on them. (This way Legolas does not have to die! Hooray!)

53. Legolas meets a girl at a ball, and falls in love with her.*

Advice: Neither the girl nor Legolas should WANT to be at the ball. This way, they have something in common already. They can stand around, whining about how awful balls are, while snacking on various Mirkwood delicacies. (And, no, I don’t know what sort of things are considered delicacies in Mirkwood. Make something up.)

54. Legolas meets a girl in the wilds, and falls in love with her.

At the time, she should either be in trouble, or be absolutely routing whatever enemy was foolish enough to attack her. If she’s in trouble, Legolas can save her. If she’s taking care of herself in the face of horrific odds, Legolas can be impressed by her skill. She explains that she’s hiking to Rivendell, and Legolas volunteers to escort her there. And they fall in love.

Obviously.

55. Legolas is tricked into getting married, and falls in love with his bride eventually.*

One day, Legolas was suffers from temporary stupidity, and somehow his father seizes that moment and uses it to his advantage. Next thing Legolas knows, he’s been married off to someone. (See Idea #5 for the alternate Angst Option.)

Though his bride is stubborn/ugly/silly/evil, the two eventually fall in love, after they’ve had all sorts of dramatic things happen to them. (The dramatic things don’t have to happen, however. You can just have them hate each other, and then they start to like each other. If you drag this on for long enough, it will make sense to the reader that they’ve gradually fallen in love.)

Alternate Idea: Someone dares Legolas to get married, and he does so, because he has succumbed to peer pressure.*

56. Legolas falls in love with a tenth-walker.

Poor Elf. He’s stuck with an annoying, talented, brave tenth-walker for several months, and by the end of it he loves her. It’s kind of sad.

Let us observe a moment of silence for him.

57. Legolas falls in love with an assassin.*

NO ONE will expect this. I mean, she’s trying to KILL Legolas. Who would fall in love with someone who’s trying to finish him off? Very few people, believe me. But Legolas breaks the mold yet again. Your readers will be astonished by the clever way in which you get the two to love each other, and it will have a happy ending (i.e. Legolas will not die).

58. Legolas falls in love with a dwarf.

You can make this story angsty. (“Legolas, you only married me to get revenge on your father!”) You can make this story comical. (“Legolas, honey, you’re standing on my beard.”) You can make this story full of biting irony. (“Something bitingly ironic happened to me today, Legolas.”)

Advice: While we all know that Dwarves are smelly and disgusting, Legolas would only fall in love with a CLEAN and BEAUTIFUL Dwarf. So make her clean and beautiful. And mild-mannered. And sophisticated.

Alternate Idea/ Idea Extra: Gimli is in love with the same Dwarf! Of course, Legolas makes a far better suitor, once he’s learned all the Dwarvish Courting Customs. Gimli never stands a chance.

Angst Option for the Alternate Idea: Consumed with jealousy, Gimli tries to kill Legolas.

Another Angst Option for the Alternate Idea: Gimli and the Dwarf-maid are in love with each other. Legolas suffers from unrequited love. Very sad and tragic.

59. Legolas falls in love with Sauron’s daughter.

You will be informed, by the ever-helpful un-purists, that Sauron is a giant eyeball and cannot have children. This is not true. Sauron was not always a giant eyeball. (In fact, he was never an eyeball at all.) He is a Maia, and possesses a body. Trounce the un-purists with this knowledge. (And if people start debating whether or not Maiar can have children, casually mention the name 'Melian'.)

Definition: Un-purists are neither true purists nor canon-wreckers: they are people masquerading as purists and Protectors of the Canon. Though they seem as enraged and all-knowing as purists, they are actually quite different from real purists, who tend to know what they’re talking about. Un-purists will scorn your Movie-knowledge, claiming to have read (and understood) the Books. Unfortunately, the things un-purists tell you will usually be false. (For example, they will tell you that Elves can’t cry, saying that Arwen shouldn’t have cried in the Movie, and ignoring various proofs found in the Books that would indicate that Elves can cry.) Un-purists are the most deadly of all reviewers.

60. Legolas falls in love with basically anyone.*

Anyone, I tell you! Be inventive, and see how ludicrous a plot you can get away with. Fairy-princesses, heiresses, Hermione Granger, cowgirls, punks... anyone. Legolas is very susceptible to females.

Suspense Options

61. Legolas doesn’t know what’s going on!

Be so vague and suspenseful that readers don’t know what’s going on either. It makes it more exciting for everyone. End the story with a dramatic plot twist. (‘The squirrels did it again!’)

62. Legolas is being hunted by _______.

As the blank indicates, you get to decide what is hunting Legolas. Make the story exciting and gruesome.

63. Legolas knows something is wrong, but no one believes him.

“Aragorn, something’s wrong.”

“Nonsense.”

“No, really.”

“Legolas, you’re being paranoid.”

“No, I’m not. Something bad is going to happen.”

“Oh, calm down, Leg— OH ERU, IT’S A — A — !!!”

(Screams.)

(Sounds of pain and suffering.)

(Sounds of Aragorn breathing his last.)


People like this sort of story. Honestly.

64. Legolas is about to become the victim of a natural disaster.*

Natural disasters are good setups for suspense and angst. There is also a large variety of natural disasters for Legolas to undergo. Take your pick, and then make Legolas suffer through it. However, try to make the natural disaster/ natural phenomenon realistic. For example, it is unlikely that Legolas would nearly freeze to death in a blizzard in Harad.

Know your geography!

65. Legolas falls into quicksand.

If you can write more than 2,000 words of Legolas thrashing around in quicksand, and also make it suspenseful, and include at least two angsty flashbacks, you’ll deserve some sort of award. Like the Award for Desperate Fanfictioneers.

Humor Options

66. Legolas has fun with his friends.*

This idea, and idea #67 as well, fall into a category known as ‘pseudo-humor’. This is because these sort of stories are not actually funny. They pretend to be, but really they’re just an opportunity for Legolas to be cute and mischievous with his friends.

Remember, nothing is funny unless it involves slapstick violence and lots of swearing.

67. Legolas has fun with his father.*

Not only is this one pseudo-humor, but it’s a lame attempt to make Thranduil look good. Shun these stories.

68. Legolas turns into a frog.

The frog-prince! LOL. ROFLOL. :D So hilarious.

Alternate Idea: Once upon a time, there was a frog. He was happy and contented. Then an Evil Fairy punished him by transforming him into a handsome Elf-prince who was being stalked by several hundred fangirls.

69. Legolas gets hit by a falling anvil.

Recent studies have revealed that the chances of having an anvil fall on one’s head increase significantly when one is carrying magnets around. In fact, magnets are the number one cause of anvil-related deaths, and in nearly all incidents, the victim had a magnet in his or her pocket. It is advised that you take the necessary precautions before stepping out of doors. – Extract from The Gondorian Science Journal.

Tragically, Legolas did not read The Gondorian Science Journal, or he might not have decided to take his magnet collection to school to show his friends.

70. Legolas goes to a slumber party!*

In this story, let your inner-hyper-adolescent shine through. Be so outrageously random that no reader can keep up with the action. Legolas should be as hyper, juvenile and stupid as you can possibly make him.

71. Legolas has a talk show.*

The most enjoyable part of talk shows is that they have commercial breaks in between. Which means that you get to write about Legolas advertising some brand of shampoo.

72. Legolas has a journal.

Another original, clever idea. Legolas is presented with a journal, and in it, he writes down all his profound thoughts on the people around him and the events that take place in his life. This can be very funny, if written correctly.

73. Legolas’s hair gets destroyed somehow.*

Everyone knows that Legolas loves his hair. Probably everyone knows this because Legolas looks so sweet and endearing when he is either 1) brushing his hair cutely, or 2) screaming hysterically at Aragorn because Aragorn stole his shampoo.

Therefore, if you dislike Legolas and want to mock him, destroy his hair somehow.

Alternate Idea: Legolas’s hair gets dyed a weird color. He locks himself in his bedroom and is not seen for days.

74. Legolas is eaten by crocodiles.

Imagine this: Legolas is wandering down a city street and then he falls down a storm drain, where he is eaten by crocodiles. This is slapstick violence at its most tasteful.

Warning: Any story in which Legolas gets eaten tends to make fangirls go berserk.

75. Legolas is a door-to-door saleself.

He is trying to sell paperclips. Unfortunately, people don’t even know what paper is anymore, because all they do is type things on their computers.

Legolas: Would you like to buy a paperclip?

Person: Huh? What’s that?

Legolas: Umm.... would you like to buy this beautiful piece of modern art?

Person: That thing?

Legolas: Yes. It’s called Serenity and it was created by the famous Derek de Lasagna. It has won famous art awards. I’m selling these limited edition miniatures.

Person: Sure! I’ll buy it! I’ll buy lots of them! I like modern art!

Moral: People think they have sophisticated tastes. Legolas knows how to use this thought to his advantage.

76. Legolas teaches a preschool class.

Legolas has taken self-sacrifice to a new level.

This story idea also works well as action/adventure. (‘Benny, please put down those scissors...’)

77. Legolas is attacked by unfriendly wildlife.

It’s a bit like a Disney movie again, except the animals don’t look cute and they don’t sing the chorus when the hero feels lyrical. They have big fangs, beady eyes and evil expressions. (I hope you realize by now that everything Legolas meets is evil. It makes his life more interesting to read about.)

78. Legolas sings a song.

Advice: It helps if you can write songs that rhyme. Of course, readers may laugh hysterically over your bad poetry, but that’s probably not what you intended. Or you could pretend it’s Legolas’s bad poetry. People will like it then.

79. Legolas plays with his yo-yo.

You can have so much fun with a yo-yo, especially when you hand it over to your favorite Elf.

80. Legolas is working for a restaurant that forces him to dress up as a banana.

Legolas would look cute as a banana.

Cute Options

81. Legolas has fun in Rivendell.*

In this cute story, Legolas runs around with Elladan and Elrohir and gets into trouble. No one can punish him, however, because he’s too cute. Be sure to include hilarious scenes with Legolas tormenting Erestor and outwitting Glorfindel. Everyone loves it when young children get the upper hand on fully grown Elves.

82. Legolas has fun in Mirkwood.*

For Legolas to have fun in Mirkwood, Mirkwood has to be child-proofed. No one wants to read about Legolas having fun in a spider-infested, evil forest. Something bad could happen to him. No! Not in this story! Make it cute. Happy, carefree Elves running about merrily. Sunshine. Lots of flowers and butterflies.

83. Legolas says something sweet and adorable.

Test the sweet and adorable comment on friends and family to make sure it’s sweet and adorable. There is nothing worse than a sweet and adorable comment that is, in reality, silly and pointless.

However, if Legolas is the one speaking, it can be a very inane/mean/stupid comment and people will still love it. For example, a talented writer can make the statement ‘Why is your nose so fat and ugly?’ cute and humorous when it comes from the mouth of three year-old Legolas.

84. Legolas learns how to whistle.

Believe me, a young child is only cute before it learns how to whistle. However, readers don’t have to suffer through the piercing noise and endless agony, so you might as well load on the sugary sweetness and pretend it’s cute.

85. Legolas picks flowers for his mother.

Fangirls like to read about young males doing nice things for their mothers. Fangirls also like to read about Legolas picking flowers, for some weird reason.

Advice: Post this on Mother’s Day.

Crossover Options

86. Legolas saves Harry Potter from Voldemort.

Harry's life has been saved by everyone else, why not have Legolas save it too? This should be very dramatic, and Legolas should get to yell ‘Away from him, you vile monstrosity’ at least once.

87. Legolas shoots Harry Potter.

This is for the fanfictioneers out there who don’t like Harry Potter. Legolas mistakes Harry for an enemy of some sort, and shoots him. Harry is no longer the boy-who-lived. He is the boy-who-got-shot-by-Legolas.

Voldemort consults Legolas, and succeeds in taking over the world shortly after.

88. Legolas falls in love with Professor McGonagall.

No comment.

89. Legolas meets Dobby the house elf.

...And throttles him to death by the end of the first chapter.

90. Legolas develops Jedi powers.

One day, when Thranduil was beating up Legolas, Legolas did a little Jedi hand-wave-thing and said, “You should go home and rethink your life”. Thranduil went off, rethought his life, and decided that he liked Legolas after all. Everyone was happy.

Inspirational quote from Legolas – “The force be with you.”

91. Legolas fights Darth Vader.

Elves with light-sabers are special. Legolas with a light-saber is even more special. Legolas fighting Darth Vader would be quite spectacular.

Alternate Idea: Legolas fights Darth Vader and Darth Vader wins. (If you like Darth Vader.)

92. Legolas saves the skier in SkiFree from certain death.

Anyone who has played SkiFree would love to see Legolas dismember the creature that kills the skier in every single game. (And there is a SkiFree section on ff.net. Hint, hint.)

93. Legolas meets the Terminator.

It might be interesting, though, to be honest, I have no idea why I wrote down this idea.

Alternate Idea: Legolas is terminated by the Terminator.

94. Legolas falls into an obscure world and has to figure out where he is.*

Not sure what universe to put Legolas in? Then simply drop him into somewhere obscure and make the story dramatic and suspenseful.

Warning: If it’s really obscure, then don’t expect many people to catch on. For all you know, you could be only person who has read that book or watched that movie.

95. Legolas meets Will Turner.*

In this brilliantly clever plot, you somehow maneuver Legolas into meeting Will Turner! He gets to go along on the adventure and fight evil, ghostly pirates!

Advice: For even more hilarity, make sure someone confuses the two at least four times per chapter.

Other Ideas

96. Legolas gets separated from the herd in Moria.

We have already determined that 1) Legolas doesn’t like caves and mines, 2) Legolas is prone to get injured in caves and mines, and 3) Legolas can be angsty basically anywhere. Write a story in which Legolas gets lost in Moria and must survive on his own for days. Of course, since this is Legolas, he barely survives, but still manages to stagger out of the mines in one piece. He then has to spend a few days recovering, during which he is angsty, but is eventually well enough to continue on the quest without having inconvenienced anyone. (Legolas heals really fast.)

97. Legolas looks for buried treasure.

Legolas discovers a treasure map, and then goes on an exciting adventure to find the treasure. He fights lots of dangerous enemies, and does many brave and valiant things. He gets injured now and then. In the end, he digs up the treasure, and carts it home. His father is very envious.

98. Legolas switches bodies with someone.*

By this I mean that Legolas’s mind/essence gets trapped inside the body of someone else. At first Legolas is horrified, but then he decides to use this to his advantage. Or he can stay horrified the whole time.

While Legolas is trapped in the someone’s body, the someone is in his body, which is probably not a good thing. There is lots of confusion, but everything works out in the end somehow. Be humorous and creative.

99. Legolas wins a free counseling session in his box of cereal.

While Legolas is eating his Spider*Crunchies one morning, he sees that he has won a free counseling session with a world-famous psychologist. Thrilled, he goes to get therapy forthwith. The concept of Legolas getting therapy amuses fangirls for some reason.

100. Legolas is abducted by aliens.

Legolas just can’t get a moment’s peace. While going on a picnic one day, he gets beamed up to the spaceship of some extraterrestrials! He fights them, kills them all, and flies the spaceship back to Mirkwood. Everyone is very impressed by his prowess, and the spaceship technology revolutionizes Middle-Earth’s computer industry.

Alternate Idea: Legolas meets Arthur Dent and hitchhikes around the galaxy.

The End.

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